Off the beaten tram tracks

"Don't sit on the window seat. Your face will become black..!".

My Periyappa (Paternal uncle) used to shout. He should know better. He was a Ticket Collector...

It always fell on our deaf ears that were muted by the loud whistles of the steam engine. Clinging on to the window and treading the foothills of western ghats through and across the rivers, coconut grooves and water falls is a sight to behold before the Shencottah-Quilon express begins its slow but steady ascent through the impregnable mountain ranges; Its a journey of highly rewarding experiences.. Via ducts, dark long tunnels, coal dust swollen eyes and blackened face and arms.. !

Apart from the Newton's laws of physics, Steam engines - the wondrous locomotive of my childhood, operate based on two rules..

1.) They are capable of exciting kids;
2.) If you are not one, it will make you one

You would agree with me, Its this excitement that keeps the steam engine close to one's heart. However on an Easter weekend, I was left wondering why the Dutch tourism board didn't apply these rules to me while pegging the ticket fares!

Behind the hype of Keukenhofs and the Zaanse Schans', lot of graceful gems of Holland are usually lost. The historic triangle of Zuiderzee towns: Hoorn-Medemblik-Enkhuizen is surely one of them; This trip is certainly not in the check list of maddening tourists nor the locals who always look for something 'Gezellig'. At least the modest crowd turnout on a holiday weekend coupled with an empty returning tram suggested as much - much to our delight, if I may add!

In hindsight, traveling this route by the unique combination of Road, Steam Engine Tram, Boat and Train not only makes you feel like Phileas Fogg, it also rejuvenates you in such a way that you might actually consider blogging about it at the end of the day :-P !!

The best part about this trip is the way its designed. Five stars to the planners of this program.

Consider this..

- The tram station at the Hoorn is slap bang at the footsteps of a huge parking lot that charges you 2 Euros to park your car for the whole day;
- Vintage tram coaches leaving Hoorn to Medemblik pulled by an even enigmatic steam engine from the 1920s in all its full glory, chugging along a scenic Dutch country side at a speed of 15-20 Km/hr, providing every bit of romance it promises.
- After a leisurely 1 and half hours, The tram stops at Medemblik under the nose of a Jetty where a ferry is already waiting for you;
- With no reason to hurry, you are given a sizable chunk of an hour to extend the picnic on the banks of IJsselmeer to have that home packed Lunch or to walk around and explore the compact village of Medemblik.
- The next 75 minutes sees you in an Old fashioned steamer with its Saloon deck sails ferrying you to Enkhuizen, on the quite waters of the largest fresh water lake in the Western Europe.
- You may then alight at the Zuider Zee museum if you are a "touch-and-go" kind of a person or take a stroll around the pretty little harbor of Enkhuizen. Eitherways the ferry drops you at the door steps of your next point of interest;
- A fast double-decker Intercity train leaves Enkhuizen quite frequently, bringing you back to the 21st century as you arrive at your car park in Hoorn 20 minutes later.

The interoperability of this scheme seem to put the software I develop to shade !

Clearly the most alluring part of the trip was the Tram ride of 20 Kms from Hoorn to Medemblik; As the tram thunders away from the station every passer-by is waving at you. Waving back at them you feel like a certain Atal Behari Vaajpayee accepting the ceremonious welcome on a state visit, although it takes a while to strike to you that its the heritage of the tram that they are waving at and not at its measly passengers. The tram in the meanwhile is busy slithering through vast scenic stretches of canals and farm houses among which I was told a few were tulip fields as well. But we were probably a bit early for them.

Before the trip I had promised my son that we are going to go in the Thomas the Train Engine and I joked to him that I will introduce him to the Fat Controller. While my son was busy concluding that the engine pulling us is more a Skarloey than a Thomas (Becase Thomas is Blue in Color while Skarloey is red it seems. Our's was Red!!), the ticket collector indeed turned out to be a befitting personality whose prosperity was visibly exuberant romanticizing the image my son had in his mind; So when I requested him to pose for a photograph with my son, Mr. Fat Controller was more than happy to oblige. He even tossed around his hat to my son and the look on his eyes were suggesting that his fantasies were coming alive. Overall the support staff in the tram were extremely helpful (and were shrewd marketers as well selling cola to toy train on wheels to ensure that your wallet is empty to the last note!); They were giving you friendly safety tips as well as entertaining packets of information when poked, such as the engine consumes 500 KG of coal for the 20 KM trip and its capable of pushing as well as pulling the carriages at same speed etc.,

The beauty of this overall package is that, it makes such a lazy day by design since all you are doing is sitting on antique locomotives and soaking in the experience for 3 long hours or more. You can't do anything but relax even if you want to. A family day outing cannot be more unplugged.

If you do plan to take this package, here are a few tips that you might want to consider:
- Weather is the most crucial factor of this trip; Do your research on the forecast and please go only if it promises to be a nice sunny day.. I know this sounds like a no-go since sun light and Northern Lights share the same probability of appearing in Holland (!!); But believe me, this would still be the most crucial factor; After all there is no fun, standing on the upper deck of a steamer under the umbrella for the heck of it, with the chilly winds lashing you from all corners
- There is no advance booking for the tram unless you are a group of critical mass; While my guess is that the tram takes around 150 - 200 passengers, you might still want to arrive at least half an hour earlier to the scheduled departure of the tram to save the probable disappointment of tickets being sold out.
- When the Tram stops at Wognum (The first stop), it stops for a while. So get down and walk all the way to the engine; You won't regret it; If you have kids, they will be allowed on the engine cabin upon request and they love it.
- You may be left with no more than a couple of hours at the Zuider Zee Museum if you arrive at Enkhuizen by boat from Medemblik. So see if its something for you and if not do walk around Enkhuizen's compact harbor/ centrum; We opted for the later. Providentially we saw a skinny bridge opening for boat traffic and the mechanics of it was quite interesting.
- If you are family with 2 kids (not toddlers) then consider taking the family ticket as its relatively cheaper. The package costs around 23,50 per person including the intercity train and is not exactly cheap;

This trip is a genuine throw back to yesteryears. And that's probably THE charm of it.. and of course the program still seam to be a secret well kept. So as I said, The steam trams of Hoorn indeed run off the beaten track..

Quite literally...

With Love
Vicky

Trivia:
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- Shencottah - Kollam route which I referred initially runs through my home town in India and it was known as the Queen of the Meter gauges. Look for the relevant subsection on this page to learn more about it.

- For more a visual experience of Shencottah - Kollam route, You may see this you tube clip; Behind the obscure video, you can still get a glimpse of the train route back home that I mentioned. The via Ducts, The tunnels, the mountains all of them are nicely captured in this song. About this video itself - Why Maniratnam, One of India's celebrated directors, came all the way to this remote southern corner of Indian subcontinent to shoot an inconspicuous train sequence is not easily explained, Unless you are from this region; Its because, interestingly the time line of that movie sequence required an old fashioned steam engine. And my home town was still one of the last bastions of Indian Railways where those friendly monsters were part of every day life;

Ski is the Limit !

The only other occasion when I have given serious attention to Skiing is while watching James Bond movies. So when I had the opportunity to do some real Alpine Skiing in Austria along with my fellow colleagues, it was more an experiment to see if its something for me; It was just a 2 day trip.. If it’s a flop, the ordeal would have lasted only a couple of days and neither my stamina nor my wallet would be over drained … More importantly I will have someone to bring me back home if need be!!

And to realize that Skiing is at least not as easy as sipping a Shaken Vodka Martini, one has to be in ones own shoes. Ski shoes I mean. This dawned on me the day when I first tried them on during the trial day in our office; With a couple of kilo grams added to each of my legs and a thick boot arresting my calf muscles, I along with everyone else, was walking like some one who is just discharged from a family planning ward!! “Is this how uncomfortable it’s going to be wearing this thing..?” I asked.. “Yup.. For the whole day”.. a matter-of-factly colleague replied. That evening I was contemplating, “Well.. I still have the choice …!!”

The place was a small ski village in the Innerkrems region of the Kranten province in Austria called Schonfeld, a location which our bus driver described as “middle of no where”. The First session on the first day of Ski lessons was bewilderment. The Ski instructor, one Mr. Roland, an easily 60 plus native but as agile as a rabbit, was explaining how to put the skis on to your shoes. He was locking the shoes with the skis by simply applying a little pressure on the feet while to me it felt as complex as if I am an Astronaut preparing for my first space walk. Despite jumping harder than Javed Miandad imitating Kiran More, I was always caught off balance landing my feet down only to get my boot’s sol thicker by a few centimeters of snow - which in turn made the shoe fitting process much more complex than what it is. By the time I got over it, I was up and running.. quite literally .... because the moment you are on your skis you are on a zero friction surface and even slightest of the slopes is good enough to put you on an involuntary take off that ends up with a grand fall finale unless you know how to stop yourself, which being on my first day I didn’t; If I manage to get up(which is again a very cumbersome and irritating process), within seconds I was moving again mildly along the direction of gravity and a seemingly unsuspecting situation turns to a disaster in no time. I simply could not stand on my own. I ask Roland, “Is there something wrong with the Skis..?” He replied “No... This is one of the best brands...” with a funny look on his face that meant “its not the skis... its you...”

It wouldn't have taken as long for Newton to discover the force of gravity had he skied before he bit the apple. Whatever else I managed further that day in the name of skiing was just fluke. No techniques, No control... At the disposal of Mother Gravity.. However I had found one fall back option to stop in case of emergencies; and what’s that..? I just told you.. Fall Back… !!

Being starters we were practicing on a ski area that was meant for Kids. And there were so many of them skiing so wonderfully well that I was not sure if it was humiliating or inspirational. But by now, I've learnt what I need to learn (!!). My balance while on the move was Ok. I am leaning forward and bending my knees. But I didn't know how to brake, how to steer and how to walk with my skis (Trust me, this is a very essential part for beginners.. Don't forget.. Mother Gravity is always watching you..). Exhausted - both mentally and physically, Score line at the end of day one read: Down.. almost Out...

Back at the hotel, I asked another colleague, for some personal tips. He and his wife were kind enough to explain me the basics. For braking, just make a 'V' with the Skis with the pivot of the V pointing in front of you while simultaneously bring your knees close to each other. (This way the inner skis will make friction against the snow and eventually reduce your speed… Aah…); For steering, Move to your right (as in move your shoulder and right knee a bit forward) and you will automatically turn left.. Do the opposite to turn right. Difficult to visualize..? Well.. Think of birds or Aeroplane.. Now, finally to anchor yourself or for walking with the skis, First get yourself perpendicular to the slope (with the help of stocks); Now peg the ski that’s towards the slope outward, take a small step with the other leg and peg it parallel to the first ski. Small steps.. all the time.. And you have taken a giant leap in skiing..!

Day 2 was crucial. Having learnt the theory I was anxious how am I going to fare in the practicals. Thankfully it was not as futile as my engineering Electronics Devices and Circuits lab (where Milman & Halkias along with the toppers of my class seemed to be the only rare breed to prove what the text book said) but as tangible as the high school chemistry lab (Blue..? Crystalline...? Ok.. Its Copper Nitrate..); Whatever I was told, seem to be working as I realized this is a race between You and Fear.. the winner takes control.. It’s just a mind game…

As I continued, I could slowly overcome the fear.... Then, I started to enjoy it…. And then I became obsessed.... I didn't even go for the first break session and kept practicing; After 3 to 4 routines, I had the confidence to try out the first blue piste. Along with Roland, I skied down a basic slalom of 8 flags; And once I had the hang of it, I repeatedly took the lift and kept skiing ignoring my calf muscles which was throbbing already. After one such slalom, a stranger came to me and asked in his broken German English "Where you from..?" and I replied "India..". "You have mountains in India?...". "Yes.. the biggest of all !!..." "You ski in India? .... ". "No.. This is my first time.....". "Oh! Can I take picture with you..?". Bemused I ask him "Why..?"; He then said "I haven't seen anyone from India who could ski that well..." I was not sure if he sounded like someone congratulating a batsman scoring a century on his debut or someone who found me as amusing as a Pomeranian riding a one wheeled cycle on Gemini Circus. Either ways I had to take heart from the fact I was a subject worth a photograph.

Much of the 2nd day's afternoon was spent taking joy rides on lifts to much higher altitudes and having nice Italian Ravioli for a late lunch at a 6500 feet restaurant that offered some breath-taking panorama of Alpine scenery. Back at my room, that night I saw the clearest sky ever and noticed some famous constellations with amazing clarity thanks to some real wilderness absent from any human light. It was the culmination of a productive trip. From the most miserable starter on day one, I ended the day 2 spotting Orion's dog for the first time together with some confidence to handle a blue piste. I am still just a 2 day old novice slogging to ski and my technique no where near perfection... but these 2 days did re-ignite some long forgotten learning skills;

I am not fit enough to be at your majesty's secret service yet. But I am sure even James Bond started like me... !!